I’ve made countless wonderful friends and connections through this blog. I will say it time and time again: I am so thankful for the people I’ve met. So thankful.
One of the people I’ve met through the blog is Kate. She doesn’t blog, but she found my balanced translocation post a while back (her husband has a BT), and we’ve had a nice email exchange ever since. Kate has had many pregnancy losses, including one at six months, which I can’t even begin to imagine.
Kate is finishing her bachelor’s degree in communication, and a couple of weeks ago she contacted me and asked if I would be interested in being interviewed for her big research paper, which she decided to do on communication related to pregnancy loss. Of course I was happy to participate. Kate said she found my use of the blog as a communication tool to be very interesting when many people dealing with pregnancy loss keep things very private. (An interesting aside: When Kate pitched the paper topic to her professor, she learned that her professor had been through years of infertility. Small world.)
So I answered several questions, including questions like the following:
- Were you able to share your story while going through it?
- Who did you feel comfortable talking to?
- Were there some people that you didn’t want to talk to?
- Did you ever feel bad about not sharing?
- Did you ever regret sharing?
- Did you ever share to help someone going through a similar experience?
- Do you think sharing or not sharing helped or hurt?
- If you could go back, would you share or not share in the same way?
In my answers to Kate’s questions, I stated that communicating about our losses has been tremendously helpful to me. Whether talking with family and friends, or working with my therapist, or participating in the online balanced translocation support group, or the blogging I do and the blogs I read, it has all been so incredibly helpful. I can’t imagine going through this sort of thing alone. I have also definitely done some of my blogging in part to help others through similar situations. I can’t tell you how good it makes me feel when I get a comment on a post from someone telling me that they felt less alone after reading what I had shared about my own situation. If I can do something to help someone else through something similar, I’m all for it.